Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Super Dad? Just Call Me Mario

I'm often referred to as Super Dad by a few friends. It's flattering but I don't think of myself as anyone doing anything above and beyond what I am supposed to do. If anything I'm always looking for opportunities to volunteer more. At times I sacrifice the time that I should be using to focus on my business.

When I worked full-time and didn't have a flexible schedule I hated having to ask for the time off to attend the kids' functions. This is what drove me to become a Realtor. I actually work more hours but I'm able to create my schedule around the children. I know many fathers out there would love to be able to be at all of the kids functions and can't because of work. I know those fathers make up for it on the weekends. Lot of my friends are in that same boat and if you're envious of me, let me tell you that I'm envious of your steady paycheck.

I am able to do the things I do because of the support I receive from great family and friends. Nine years ago when I was entering single fatherhood I made a decision early on to welcome people into my life that shared a love for my children. I know at the time I had mixed feelings of how I was going to do this. I went through my divorce with a lot of pain and anger towards my ex. I learned quickly that this was a very unhealthy attitude for me and my children. As a man I had a lot of pride and I see single moms deal with the same kind of pride that blinds them from seeing what is best for their children. I quickly put my pride aside and accepted the help being offered. Yes this included my ex-wife's family.

My ex obviously has her own issues and demons to deal with and 9 years later I still offer words of encouragement in order for her to try to salvage any type of relationship she can with her children. My ex-in-laws and I are very close and keeping them involved in my kids' lives has been very beneficial to them and myself.

I am a father who is actively involved with his kids but they have sacrificed because of it. I can't always afford to get them what they want and as they become teenagers that becomes even tougher on them. There are times that I'm ashamed because I am not yet the multi-millionaire that I thought I was going to be when I was 18 but I appreciate the lessons that I am able to teach them about life, finances, and balance. I will always struggle to find balance but that is how I want it. I always want to be looking for ways of improving.

What I am trying to lead into is that as a single parent life can be tough. There has been women doing it for years by themselves and I've used them as inspiration. When I think life is tough I take a step back and realize that there is always someone else out there that has it tougher. This message is for single parents or married couples. When life is throwing an obstacle in your path, keep in mind that others have had it happen to them. Look for a support group or that special friend that will fill you with enough positive vibes to turn your life around. For those of you that everything going right help spread some love and extend a hand to someone in need. We have so many resources out there that nobody should ever feel alone.

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